Friday, January 22, 2016

Can I Decide Not To?

Deciding not to is akin to the most courageous. Deciding not to is where those who dare tred daily.
And I wonder..
Can I decide not to?
Can I decide not to be small? Not to be what I think others want to hear? Not to be the easy way out or the little white lie? Can I  decide in advance not to be the one thing everyone thinks I should be, the restrictions of female or what is deemed appropriate of my gender? Damn it, can I decide not to be expectations period?
Can I decide not to be what someone told me to be or told me not to be, what someone suggested I  was or will only accept me as? Can I decide not to be the limits of what I think I can do or the limits other people place on me?
Can I decide not to be my past? Not to be restricted by my present and not to narrow my possibilities in the future?
Can I  decide not to be the same space that everyone around me occupies?
Can I decide not to belong to others?
It's a very big decision. One I'm not always great at making. Deciding not to is as important as deciding to do.
Can I decide not to shrink back?
And I wonder...
Can I decide not to be anyone but me?


  1. Such a thought provoking question. Thank you.

  2. Yes, asking these questions does lead to a positive resolve to be confident in who you are, forgetting all the things that you are not.

  3. Hard questions. Hard to be strong enough to answer the way you know is right. I wish you strong steps forward.