Monday, January 2, 2017

New Year. New Word.

Beginnings fade. New Year's resolutions are stuck in those faded beginnings and by February those glittery resolutions are tin like and hollow. What I do like are words. They endure past January and I can hold onto a special one all year. So each year I make a word (or phrase) my guide. A focus that pulls me through. Words chosen well outlast false starts and shiny things.

2016: Last year my phrase was, THIS YEAR IS MINE.
And I made it so. It empowered me to think that what was standing between my goals and my reality was ME. So I challenged myself to take ownership of what I wanted. To do everything possible to move closer to my goals both personal and bookish.
And what a year it was! I completed and polished my second book. That book went on submission and I am still awaiting good news on the outcome of that process. I also won a major writing competition and had another piece of poetry published. Every time I felt like giving up, every time I was scared to submit my work somewhere, I reminded myself of my phrase for the year and decided I could weather rejection. What I could not weather was shrinking from my goals. And I made the year mine.

2017: This year my word is RELENTLESS.
Not relentless as in cruel, uncaring or harsh.
But, relentless in hope. Relentless in chasing. Relentless in writing. Relentless in faith. Relentless in love. Relentless in caring. Relentless in dreaming. This year I will not give up. I will continue in everything I hoped and dreamed for last year. I will continue to expand my wings of being myself and  embracing truth and vulnerability.
I will be more fully myself. I will continue to grow as a writer and show up on both the page and in my daily life. I will embrace relentless courage. Relentless bravery. Relentless ME.

I wish you all a RELENTLESS year of YOU too. Make it great, people. Make it brave and bold!

What will your word be this year?

Monday, November 28, 2016

What it means to fly.

I have wings.
They wrap around me. Around my tired soul. Around all the dreams that haven't yet come to pass and the promises of things still so far away that they are nothing more than whispers.
I have wings.
They unfurl in the evenings. When I am alone. When I pray. When on my knees I bring this ache deep inside and pour it out in tears to a God I know hears, but I cannot see. And sometimes, I want so desperately to see.
I have wings.
There is a promise tucked away behind my very rib cage with that skittery heart of mine that these wings do in fact fly.
I have wings.
Sometimes I hold them, to remind myself they are real. That I can do this. That I've got this. That I am enough.
I have wings.
And I am growing into them. Growing into myself. Growing into the ability to believe in the unseen, the impossible.
I have wings.
They were given to me so I might believe that I will not always walk upon this earth. But one day, when I'm ready, when I have struggled and fallen, when I have tried and failed and tried again, when His timing is perfect. On that day. Sweet day ahead. I will see the things I am hoping for come to pass. I will see myself in that sky. And I will know.
I have wings.
And I will fly.

(photo credit- Helena Murray)

Thursday, June 16, 2016

She's One.

You are ONE today. So far you've come. So far to go.
My wish for your life is simple. But also complex. For I wish that you would always be you.

May you always stay strong in who you are. May you always have women around you who inspire your strength, you lift you when the world pulls, who give you wings when you've forgotten how to fly. Woman who have found their voice, who are not afraid to speak, even if their opinions are different to others. May there be woman who make space for your words and who listen and learn, weep and also celebrate as you run and walk, stumble and get up again. And again. And again.

May you alway know your value and worth. And may you be surrounded by other women who understand the beauty and strength of the female existence and who celebrate the uniqueness of their own womanhood.
May you grow to love the body you have, the weight you are, the marks and imperfections. If you decide to have children may you see stretch marks  as the beautiful memories of birthing. May you see scars as a trophy of that one time when you climbed a mountain and made it, even though you nearly didn't. And honey? There are many mountains. Both physical and mental. May you climb them all.

May there be men, strong and gentle, humble and courageous and may they stand firm by your side. May they be your father, your grandfathers, your cousins, your friends. May you come to stand firm by their side too. And one day perhaps a special man whose hand you hold as much as he hold yours. Whose heart you protect as he protects yours.

In this world may you be cherished and cherish others. May you wear a crown and also help others to find theirs. May you find love and beauty, hope and peace. May you stand up for those who cannot. And may you extend yourself mercy and grace when you are the one who cannot stand.

May you remember in it all, that you are created for this day, for this age, for this time in history. May you live with purpose and believe that your creator has an awesome and never before seen plan for your life. May you have the courage to live. Because sometimes just breathing is courageous.

Yes, my wish for you is simple. And also complex. For I wish that you would always be you.
Happy Birthday little Indigo. Love Aunty Tab xx