Thursday, August 27, 2009

But, I have an excuse...


Here's why I haven't been revising my manuscript...honest!

I am the Queen of Excuses when there is a task looming that I don't want to do. Yeah, I know some of you out there are probably thinking, "No, I am the Queen of Excuses." But you are not. Sorry. This is my kingdom created by the hands of my own procrastination and perfectionism and thus you might be princesses, but I AM THE QUEEN.

I have a memoir in desperate need of some re-writing. But I am in love with it's sister the sequel and, I am just going to come out and say it, I don't want to go back to the first one. Oh, I will...eventually.... After I work my way through the following list of excuses.

1. The planets are not aligned correctly and it is not a leap year. You can't expect me to start work in an odd numbered, non-leap year with incorrectly aligned planets now can you?

2. That black cat just crossed the street... or was that next door's budgie(bird) ? Should the budgie walking across the street bother me? It does. I think I'll go have a little lie down.

3. The ice-cream truck is here. I have to have ice-cream. Why can't I have ice-cream? Why do you want to make me cry? I'll start straight after the ice-cream...

4. I need to bath the kids. Then I need a bath. Really. I'll be ready to start work after a bath. The hot water is very therapeutic and then after the bath.... and painting my toe nails and a glass of wine, oh and cheese, cheese goes nice with wine... do I have any cheese? I'm just going to check. What was I saying I was going to do after the bath?

5. The dishwasher needs emptying. I should really empty it before I start writing. I mean what if husband wants, say, a nice clean cup, but it's still in the dishwasher? Hey? What then? I'll just go empty it... and re-stack it and put another load on and mop the floors and, goodness, look at the mess the boys left after dinner...

6. Is that the time? Oh, I can't start that late in the evening! I mean, I'd get tired after one measly hour of re-working that writing and, gosh, I feel tired already. My eyes will be fresh in the morning. I'll start then.

7. Well, I didn't mean first thing in the morning. I have to take my son to school. Then straight after I'm going to open up that file and...

8. Did I feed the dog? She looks hungry... that file can wait just a second...

9. Speaking of hungry...when did I last eat? Breakfast seems like ages ago.... I'm just going to have an early lunch and then after lunch...

10. Is that a cat across my keyboard? Oh, so cute! I couldn't possibly wake it up. I'll just wait a little bit longer...


So, the long and the short of that one is, feed the dog, move the cat, take lunch to the keyboard, put toddler down for a nap and START WORK TAB!

PS- It's not my cat. It's not my photo. My uncle sent it to me. Cute though. I'll get to writing after this blog post. Or maybe I'll just go read your blogs first... What did Suzanne post about? That looks interesting. Just a quick comment.... I have time for a few quick comments....

So, princesses or princes out there... ever, ever felt this way???

19 comments:

  1. I think I could challenge you for that crown. Yes. Although you make a much funnier queen.

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  2. LOL!
    I feel that way all the time. All.The.Time.

    And it used to be even worse back in college when I was writing essays/papers the day they were due.

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  3. I'm sorry, but I can beat those stories. Or rather, not me...

    When my future wife should have been studying for exams, she would do anything but. Eventually I removed all her shoes from her apartment, so she couldn't leave, and left her alone for the day, thus forcing her to study.

    When I returned that night, she had cleaned her oven. With a toothbrush.

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  4. Haha! That's so true! I definitely do that too!!!! Thanks for the laugh! And that picture is adorable.

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  5. The only time I voluntarily do laundry is when I'm avoiding writing.

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  6. Oh God, Tabitha. You are the Queen of funny as well. I could challenge you, but I won't. My list is different than yours, but excuses are excuses are excuses. I haven't written anything on my WIPS in weeks, telling myself that marketing the already published book is more important. Balance, balance, balance. Can't seem to find my footing on the balance beam.
    By the way, what's a budgie?
    Karen

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  7. Never ever felt that way. I'll get to writing as soon as I check out a few friends' blogs. I should get out some files, but my dog is sleeping with her head on my chair roller, so I can't move. I so totally agree with you! This was so funny and so ... me.

    And love the kitty. That is one cute picture.

    Helen
    Straight From Hel

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  8. hahahahahahaha! Love the kitty and the excuses.

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  9. Procrastination= great writer. remember that always.

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  10. That little kitten is the cutest thing! Awww...

    Yes, I've been known to use all of the excuses on your list! Good luck!

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  11. I like to call it rationalization. I can rationalize anything away. Please tell me that is a real picture. I need to believe it!

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  12. Felt this way too many times. Sigh.

    I love the photo. I showed my kiddos. :-)

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  13. I feel this way almost every day. Luckily the past couple weeks I did have a legitimate excuse of having to work at my other job. Today of course that means I have to catch up on posting my blogs, front loading my eco blog and reading & commenting on blogs. Not to mention Facebook & Twitter updates. If I do all that now it will give me tons of time to write tomorrow. That is after I clean & grocery shop of course...

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  14. Thanks for making me laugh about something that usually makes me want to cry. I can so relate, and I don't have kids to use as an excuse.

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  15. LOVE the list. It's odd but even housework looks appealing to me when I put something off! It always seems daunting to me to go back to a ms. I set aside months ago. It feels like that chapter of my life is closed and I should be moving on.

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  16. Lori, a queen match off then? LOL :)

    Megan, oh, I had a whole other list when I was writing uni papers!

    Gary, I am still laughing. A tooth brush???

    Kristen, my pleasure :)

    Carrie, me too!

    Karen, sorry about the budgie reference. It's a really common pet bird over here. You don't have them there?

    Lazy writer, you may join the kingdom.

    Helen, LOL :)

    Tricia, I'm glad :)

    T. Anne, very true!

    Jill, thank you.

    Suzanne, okay. Yes. The picture is real :) Rationalization... I like that!

    Jess, kiddos like it?

    Jenn, good luck.

    Deb, always happy to make someone laugh.

    Steph, thanks :) And yes, even housework looks good on writing days. Why is that?

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  17. Number three is such a valid excuse. Who can write them the ice cream truck music filters in through the windows? It's like Pavlov and his dogs...instant salivation. :)

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